BEING A COMPLETE WOMAN 101

I know it’s been a while, but you should know I think deeply before coming on here to share something I feel will be useful for my wonderful audience. That is to say , I always have you in mind.

So for today's Ted talk “being a complete woman” sounds so serious and cliche.  I had been talking to some of my female friends earlier on something I was doing, I suddenly started to get this feeling of “I need to get my life together” I started to deliberately make breakfast for myself, buy body products, buy new clothes, new hair products, dress super nice and actually consider doing a little make up and I started exercising.

ME!! Exercising? Something must be really up. All these things seem so normal to some people but to some other people like me standing on the 3 legged table of I don’t eat breakfast, this isn’t normal, I started to think to myself, women end up getting married and becoming overwhelmed by so much responsibilities that they don’t take care of themselves anymore, they stop exercising, stop applying make up/ dressing well, start adding serious weight because they aren’t just used to this new stress of marriage and children. In actual fact they become bosses at taking care of themselves and their husband and children some years down the line(3-5 years) or even more. Honestly I’m not telling you to prepare for marriage or prepare to have children you need to take care of, all I’m saying is there are some things we must learn to do now, so down the line at 60 we will still be popping, these things end up becoming part of us if you do these things for the next 21 days it becomes part of you .

Most women excel at one part and fail at others. For example they excel at cooking and preparing food and fail at looking good for themselves first! before their spouses. Some others excel at looking good and fail at taking care of their families etc.

So after all this my story what do we need to do? Right?

 1.  Take time out for yourself now! and do something you love – my sister calls me minister of enjoyment, that is because I cannot come and kill myself, me that I’m going to swim on Sunday, I’m not saying finish your money or something, it could be a book you need to read or write, yoga, exercise, dancing, painting etc. 1 hour out of 24 hours matters. You can join a dance class, pay for gym membership, paint, your happiness is so important you have no idea.

2      2. Exercise – YES!! Maintaining that fine shape isn’t an easy thing, if you can’t exercise take a walk or jog, and if you don’t care about your shape, you’re so confident it can’t fade away, awesome!! Your heart is there for you to think about. A very big secret I found about exercising, did you know when you exercise you don’t have cramps. Try it and thank me later.

3    3.    Breakfast- “but I don’t have time, I’ll be late for work” breakfast is the most important meal of the day, if you don’t want to add weight, eat breakfast. You can just take cereal or be like me and make a mini British breakfast (bread, eggs, sausage, and baked beans).

4   4.  Pick out your clothes down for the week – This gets you prepared for the week, I just started this like 3 weeks ago my cousin introduced this to me and it makes my life so much easier, I just pick on Saturday and iron the clothes down. It even makes you more stylish, Yes!! More stylish because now you begin to think this blouse would go with these pants, you become intentional about your outfit and you begin to look better and get winks and compliments from that guy at work (just kidding).

       5. Get a to-do list- buy yourself a small note pad and write what you need to do, the things you need to remember the next day. You might say to-do- lists are not your thing, try and write a to-do list starting with bath, brush, dress nice, eat breakfast , little things you know you definitely have to do, when you begin tick these things you begin to feel good about yourself. For people that can be forgetful like myself , this will really help. You can also write things you need to do some days after. All these helps you to be at least a bit organized.

Of course I won’t spill all the juice here on being a complete woman; I will give more details to my students joining ruberyln finishing school in October.

 You might be thinking you don’t need this. Whether you’re single, in a relationship, just married, or even married for more years than I can imagine, you can still do these things.

Welcome back to my blog , Thank you for consistently reading.

I love this weeks discussion so much.

You know how people ask you for maybe gum and you say you don't have and the next thing that comes out from their mouth is "you're a lady now, you're supposed to have all these things",  and in your mind you're like 'from just asking me for gum i'm supposed to have these things' .
What things ???
Well I have formed a habit of doing your assignment , I have done it again and i'll take you through the essentials you should have in your purse.
Having invested in your bag collection as we spoke earlier about , what do we need to put inside the bags? I mean we can't just carry empty bags right? what are the essentials we need in our bags.

1. Safety pin/thread and needle :You know those times your skirt zip can just rip off or your button keeps opening or the space between your two buttons seems too wide and its revealing your cleavage, well safety pins and needle and thread are your emergency go-to guys.

2. Hand sanitizers : Please we all know this is necessary germs everywhere!!!  we live and breathe around them , we cant be washing our hands all the time just a tiny drop can fight some of those germs .

3. Perfume : Ladies, having a small bottle of perfume in our bags cannot be over emphasized , even better now we can get perfume oils that are portable and can be kept in our bags. You know the spots to put perfume right? Your wrists and rub together, your elbow curve , behind your ears and the side of your ankles. Yes o! You must "smell nice " 🤣

4. Debit card/emergency cash sometimes a cashless policy can do you well, but at the same time let us have at least cash of N2000-N5000 in our bags for emergency. Emergencies such as car break down , being jilted by an angry guy after lunch or dinner(i'm being open minded , don't judge me ) , atm isn't dispensing and some other weird and silly but important things.  Anything can happen we need to stay prepared as ladies.

5. Red lipsticks/lip gloss- it so important to have this. Why red? you might ask , well for one thing it confuses the guys (so i heard ) it gives a pop that's another good reason and it makes your teeth look whiter !! best reason. Whatever your complexion red lipstick is a go-to, but if you still don't trust the power in red, try out lip gloss you can never go wrong with that. Just so you don't walk around with a dry lip , there is this glow lip gloss gives, even to a natural face. This isn't a beauty blog but it makes your lips look beautiful.

6. Mints/gum-  If it's just for your sanity please carry this around to help others and yourself at the same time. Get rid of bad breath after a long day or in the middle of the day. Its not that you didn't take care of your teeth well, you did. But closing your mouth for long like when you are sleeping can cause bad breath also this is why we brush in the morning. we also need mint to get rid of certain smell from food like fish, garlic etc.

7. Bobby pins/ribbons - Though bobby pins always disappear some how, we still need them in this heat especially if you have long hair on, i'll advice short hair but even this sun can't stop our   long hair slay because we are hotter .

8. Hair brush/comb - Lets take an instance. I'm going for an outing and i rest my head on the sit and it puffs up by the time i get to my destination, instead of me using my hand to comb my hair ,I rather  an actual comb or  a brush to my rescue. Brushes and combs vary with types of hair or weaves worn.

9. Phone charger/Power bank - Another instance you know how you go for a party and you are taking pictures, putting up videos and all of that. Time to go home, 2% battery, no charger , no Samsung S10 to charge your phone 🤣. no power bank . Worse could happen emergencies and all of that.
Always keep your phone alive and always have airtime to call its very important.

10. Tissue- Spilled tea, spilled food , catarrh etc. tissue is used for so much this is why it is important to have it with you always.

I remember last year when i was teaching my finishing school ladies,( shout out to ruberyln finishing school Queens ).
 We treated this topic and it was a lot of controversy , how will we put all these in our bags and all of that.
Look at these items they are all small and can fit into a small purse which you can put in your bag or you can create a space for it in your bag.

Thank you for reading

African Bohemian Gypsy

photo credit: Dan

I am on natural hair right, it can be stressful , always looking for ways to grow the hair to maintain it,make it curly, shine, bla bla bla .One of the  best ways to make it grow is "didi" a Nigerian kind of style originated by the Yoruba people, another way is making protective hairstyles to avoid it drying out and breaking and when this doesn't happen it will grow i mean its simple math, i decided to do one of the many protective styles which is the "box braids" in a different way of course , short box braids actually.

After about 2 weeks my hair started to come out, i did a big chop so my hair is still on the Afro level. How can my hair start coming out of the braids after 2 weeks i'm supposed to use the hair for at least 2 months , it was still manageable. 3 weeks past now in the fourth week after so much oiling , creaming, applying moose, i just thought to myself  how can i cover this up and still look stylish? There and then the gypsy idea was born,

 Tying my scarf in a stylish way that i wont look like i'm going to church or look " too street" for work, and aside the fact that i'm covering my rough hair, i'm actually looking stylish. I had to compliment this gypsy scarf with my dressing and just go full gypsy, make up and hoop earrings.
if you want to try the bohemian gypsy look you have to consider;

• Choice of scarf - it has to be silk , it looks best with silk scarf, chiffon could also do but this will give a better effect. 
• You need hoop earrings 
  
• free clothes  but not massive clothes 
  

I know a lot of us ladies struggle with this natural hair coming out after three weeks or less , worry no more you can now tie your scarves and still look stylish as always ruberyln got you covered with the new Ruberyln gypsy scarf easy to purchase.
 IG: @ruberyln
the best part of this look is you can wear it to church  and still look good for some of us that need to cover our hair going to church,

and it also goes nice for  casual outings,

Don't forget my previous blog where i mentioned investing in classics, the time is now ladies. This is a classic piece. You have options to tie it in another way or around your neck, but that is tutorial for another day.

Other protective hairstyles for natural hair

1. Ghana weaving 
2. Box braids 
3. Faux Locs
4. Crochet Braids
5. Wearing wigs 
6. "Didi" is for growth never forget 

Freebie for this week

Question: what is the dictionary name for African natural hair, put your answer in the comment section.

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